The End Where I Begin

So most blogs start out by documenting the beginning or inception of a special journey or new direction in one's life. Mine will begin at the end of the most thrilling, frightening, exhilarating, satisfying, daunting and wonderful year of my life. The year I up and decided to move half way around the world from Toronto, Canada to Sydney, Australia after never being away from home more than a month in my entire 23 years. 

The past year has been one of many firsts; first goodbye, first apartment, first love, first masters degree, first time living with a boy, etc. etc. It has been a year filled with ups and downs and curve balls thrown at me in every direction. And though I doubted myself, I have come to adore Sydney and living on my own and am quite sad to leave. I will be kicked out of the country, on account of my student visa running out, in a few short weeks and leaving my new Sydney family behind to go back to my old life which I left exactly 382 days ago.

I am both terrified and excited by this move. It is bittersweet as I have come to love my life in Sydney and am depressed just thinking about all the beautiful people I've met--my new family--that I must now leave behind. At the same time I have not seen my family and most of my friends in so long, I am busting to be with them again. It is an odd feeling, much like the one I had when first arriving to Australia. Sad to leave, scared of the future, but so ready and excited to do something new. Another similarity from when I came to now that I'm leaving is the unknown. I had no idea what Sydney would be like, how long I wanted to stay and what would happen. And now I have no idea what being at home will feel like and if I will stay or come back to Sydney. Somehow though, I have always been at peace with not knowing, and if it turns out anything like last year did, then bring it on!